DISQUS

Shannon Whitley · 6 months ago

Hallelujah. Thank you for writing this post. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one in the world who feels this way.

Adam Pieniazek · 6 months ago

I hear where you're coming from Danny, but my iPhone helps me jot down someone's contact info or a follow up point real quick and get right back into the conversation near immediately. If I'm at dinner with someone, I won't sit there tweeting the whole time, but at networking events, mobile twitter apps lets me follow people on the spot and not have to worry about getting their contact info.

Pros and cons to each approach.
.-= Adam Pieniazek´s last blog post ...Boston Guest Post Roundup =-.

Danny · 6 months ago

Agreed that there are pros and cons to everything Adam (hence why I mentioned they're suited to some more than others).

I guess I'm just jaded from seeing constant eyes and fingers on the tools as opposed to real people interaction. Sign of the times? Maybe.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts, always a pleasure good sir.

Adam Pieniazek · 6 months ago

Likewise, I guess I'm just accustomed to seeing friends around me always texting/tweeting for so long that it doesn't really stick out anymore.

To play devil's advocate, wouldn't it be slightly anti-social to ignore texts/tweets if the person on the other end would be interested in joining up with the group you're currently with.

It's an interesting point in either case, now I'm wondering how often I seem rude while tweeting. When I meet someone for the first time, I always try to devote my attention to learning about them, but it's so ingrained I wonder if I subconsciously pull out my iPhone and don't even realize it!
.-= Adam Pieniazek´s last blog post ...Tweetdeck on the iPhone =-.

Danny · 6 months ago

I think the point about the person on the other end is valid. It's encouraging the social aspect of the app's use, as opposed to the anti-social. And obviously it brings more friends together.

Like you say, maybe it all becomes second nature to people that you're not even aware you're doing it, or for how long? One user's normality is another user's peeve ;-)

Rodney Rumford · 6 months ago

You are being idealistic.

I hear your point but this is the world we now live in. Mobile apps rock when i am in stuck in traffic, at the airport, having a beer with friends, or just laying at the beach.

You are insinuating that you cant be effective connector and multitask. Some people can, some people can't.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

Cheers!

Danny · 6 months ago

Hey there Rodney,

Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts, appreciate it.

I don't think it boils down to insinuations of non-effective multi-tasking; it's about the personal and human approach. Tweeting (or texting) while in company isn't multi-tasking, it's simply bad manners.

I think there's a definite difference.

Cheers :)

Rodney Rumford · 6 months ago

i hear ya on the bad manners part. it is like people are disinterested. i normally wont tweet when having dinner, but i will do it in a casual social setting. especially if it does not take away from what is happening in that social circle.

i use it as an opportunity to educate/convert people ;)

Danny · 6 months ago

Now that I can see as a benefit, and one of the pros of mobile apps in general. :)

fiorenza · 6 months ago

Hi Danny,

I agree with your article and I do not think you are an idealist. If you are, then I am the same.
I cannot stand bad manners either.
Fiorenza

Marty Thornley · 6 months ago

Hey Danny,

I'm with you on this. It gets really surreal sometimes when a group of people will all be twittering or texting away or checking facebook, wrapped up in their 'social media' and yet being incredibly anti-social at the same time.

Live in the moment and enjoy the people you are actually with. That's what it's all supposed to be about anyway, right? Connecting with people? So put away your phones and mobile apps for two seconds and connect. Be social.

Anyway - gotta run. Sitting here at dinner with my family and I have to go Twitter about this article!
.-= Marty Thornley´s last blog post ...BlogStarter Version 1.1 =-.

Danny · 6 months ago

Haha, you are being ironic there Marty, aren't you? ;-)

@RiaSharon · 6 months ago

Not to be redundant but... yeah, what Danny said! People are shocked, even appalled, that I don't have an iPhone/Blackberry. My phone is a... phone. I think it may have been FREE. *gasp* but I know my addictions and this is one way for me to create some boundaries.

When I'm NOT on my laptop, it's because I want to be wherever I am, with whoever I am... my kids, my friends... or with YOU! In my constant challenge to be "fully present" in life, I feel that Tweeting in public just doesn't serve that higher purpose.

So peeps, if you send me a text message, don't expect an elaborate response coz I don't have a keyboard! :)
.-= @RiaSharon´s last blog post ...Zen Mommy Minute: Happy and Free =-.

Danny · 6 months ago

I think that's a key point, Ria. I think we can all agree that Twitter is pretty addictive as it is and the ease of smart phone tweeting can make it even more so. Do we always need to be talking in 140-characters?

Kyle Flaherty · 6 months ago

A week ago I would have been disagreeing with you Danny, but I lost my iPhone in the pool this past weekend and as I mentioned on my own blog yesterday I'm actually feeling quite liberated. Too often I would depend on my iPhone as a way to do something in lieu of reaching out to actual humans and you see it constantly at events and even when out on a Saturday night. How long can I last without another "smart" phone? Not sure, but it's been nice while it lasted.

/kff
.-= Kyle Flaherty´s last blog post ...Phoneless and Loving Life =-.

Danny · 6 months ago

It's strange how an enforced parting can make us re-evaluate. I'll admit, I used to be the biggest video game nerd until we moved house and my Xbox (version one) got damaged. Took two weeks to get it back from Microsoft and in that two weeks I learned I don't need to be Master Chief's eyes 24/7. Go figure...

Looking forward to reading your post, heading over there now.

Brandon Mendelson · 6 months ago

Hi Danny,

I think you're absolutely right. Aside from when Amanda and I are doing our projects, I try to steer clear of carrying anything on me (electronic or otherwise) that would distract from 1. Meeting new people and 2. Enjoying the experience of being disconnected.
.-= Brandon Mendelson´s last blog post ...Students, Twitter, and the SUL =-.

MSchechter · 6 months ago

I honestly see this as two separate posts... the first one is the power and uses for mobile computing and the second is about their excessive (and often inappropriate use).

The modern mobile tools are incredibly powerful and reach way beyond Twitter. From access to email, amazing tools like Evernote and RSS readers, I am now able to access, consume and share an immense information with friends and colleagues. These tools, when used correctly, can help you grow and enhance your network.

Where you have a completely valid point is the appropriate usage of these tools. We need to learn to use the off button every once in a while, especially when with company... It's not so much a matter of living in the present, but a matter of living in our present location. It's great to keep your social circle up to date, but never at the expense of the person sitting right in front of you.
.-= Michael Schechter´s last blog post ...How Evernote Is Pulling My Life Together! =-.

Danny · 6 months ago

You're more than likely right, mate. I'm not disagreeing that for overall uses, smart phones are incredibly effective. Perhaps my thinking is that they're too effective and encourage user addictiveness. Or, maybe that same user would be the same with a basic cell phone and text.

I guess I just feel that we're letting technology take over our lives and forgetting what we all used to do beforehand. Social media is fantastic but let's not forget the social part of it - offline as well as on.

MSchechter · 6 months ago

I agree on the addiction front, but I think it is more about learning (and exerting) discipline. I am definitely one who can get carried away and have had to learn to lay some ground rules for myself :)

I just don't think you can dismiss the tools when the problem is really on our end. These tools are going to keep evolving and becoming more ingrained in our lives, so we better figure out how WE can change.
.-= Michael Schechter´s last blog post ...How Evernote Is Pulling My Life Together! =-.

Jen Wilbur · 6 months ago

I'm SO right there with ya, Danny. I loves me some Twitter, but I feel so rude entering text in to my phone while visiting with friends and colleagues. Every once in awhile I'll do it, but it's usually because I'm being egged on by a friend (most of mine aren't on Twitter).

Time with family, friends and colleagues lose value if you're not paying attention - whether it be because you're Twittering, texting, talking to someone else on the phone or just plain not listening.
.-= Jen Wilbur´s last blog post ...rockstarjen: RT @unmarketing: Could you take 5 seconds and give me ur opinion? http://twtpoll.com/54hava Just took it folks--it takes 5 secs max =-) =-.

Rachel Kay · 6 months ago

I agree with you to a point as someone who's Blackberry is a third appendage. It is rude to sit and Tweet while enjoying a meal or other social experience. However, that isn't the only time that one can use a Twitter mobile app and there are a lot of times it comes in handy. When I go to tradeshows with a client I like to Tweet from the show floor, and often I end up connecting with others I didn't know were there. It's also much easier to access DMs, and sometimes those are urgent and important just like any email. In addition, there is the same entertainment and informational value of reading tweets outside of your office, i.e. waiting for a meeting, traveling, etc...

As someone who travels somewhat often and attends a lot of meetings, its great to feel connected out of the office. It alleviates a lot of the catch up that goes with being offline for an entire day. Just my thoughts! :)

Rachel

Danny · 6 months ago

I can definitely see their business uses, Rachel, and I agree that at trade shows especially, mobile tweeting can be easier and more immediate than laptop or notebook tweeting at a designated Wi-Fi area.

I think my main peeve is the social aspect, which apps can make all too easy to forget. Perhaps a follow-up post is in order ;-)

iGoMogul · 6 months ago

I hear you Danny. Hopefully as mobile social applications become more and more commonplace an etiquette for their use will develop in the same way it has with their online equivalents. I think a lot of people probably don't even realize that others might not appreciate them texting and twittering away in social settings, and that they would change their behavior if made aware of that fact.

Greg @ iGoMogul

Ari Herzog · 6 months ago

You're idealistic--or why do you have a cellphone in the first place? I have a friend in her late 20s who doesn't own a cellphone. That's Luddicism.

Rewinding time about two decades before iPods, did you ever own a WalkMan or a BoomBox? I did... for the same reason mobile apps make sense.
.-= Ari Herzog´s last blog post ...11 Examples of Newburyport Users on Twitter =-.

Danny · 6 months ago

I think there's a key difference between communication apps and music products, Ari.

I rarely see people continue to listen to their iPods when a friend's talking to them, or if they're at an event they want to be at. I do, however, see people typing away furiously on their phones.

With regards why I have a cell phone, simple - I need to be contactable for calls when away from the office environment. I don't need a Twitter mobile app for that.

As I've mentioned in both the post and some responses, I do see the benefit of mobile apps, as well as the downside of them. I can see that a follow-up post is definitely in order to expand on the point(s) and comments made so far.

Cheers for stopping by, fella, always a pleasure. :)

Kneale Mann · 6 months ago

Hey Danny,

I know I was supposed to send you that information but as you know I prefer to use an ink-dipped feather that I scrach on to wood pulp which is in-turn deliveried via horseback.

It should be at your trading post by month's end.
.-= Kneale Mann´s last blog post ...Wanna Make More Money? =-.

iGoByDoc · 6 months ago

Danny,

I agree here with you here... kind of.

I think the title should have been... "Is your Smart phone a tool or are you?"

I think it comes down to the ability to be social in a social situation. It is funny how many people I have met, or heard of this happening through others, that are very social online but you put them in a real human social scene and they freeze up and talk to no one. But they will be in the corner, looking at their iPhone or whatever device and be chatting away, looking busy, and letting the world, or whoever is watching, know what is going on that they are not participating in.

In my business however, my iPhone is my computer away from the desk. Since so much do what I do is online, I need to have it with me wherever I go. Sure, at times I wish I could put the damn thing in a fire-pit to get away from the noise and constant attention it brings, but at the end of the day it is a necessity for what I do. And I know when it is time to put it away and be "social" or just freaking relax.

Also there are many situations I have been in where I am out for the night and people are just focused on their phone and not paying attention to the humans in front of them... but ya know what? Maybe that is OK for them.

Maybe "social media" tools such as twitter, facebook etc and the hand held devices are bringing the people who would usually never socialize in public out of their shell a little bit.

I think it is about just not being a "tool" in social situations. When out with friends or family do not check your twitter stream every 5 mins... or your facebook updates... Use your mouth and communicate for heck sakes.

Maybe these guru's out there telling people how to make social media work for you maybe needs to write a book called.... "I'm Now Anti-Social Thanks To Social Media... Now What? An Advanced Guide On Making You A People Person In The In Today's Social Media World" (I think that would be a funny read myself... hmmm. maybe I should write it!)

So, to summarize folks... Do not let your tools of social media make you out the be the "tool" in the real worlds crowd!

Nuf said!

Doc
.-= iGoByDoc´s last blog post ...Doc Reviews Star Trek =-.

Danny · 6 months ago

Darin,

This is a great point and one of the things I love about blog comments; the ability to share views and reasons (and I LOVE that alternative post title!!).

I agree that smart phones and the various apps available for them are incredibly useful business tools, that I do not doubt or question for a second. And, as much as I "get by" without one at the minute, as I mention the new Palm Pre looks pretty swish, so who knows.

I'm all for shy people becoming more socially comfortable, yet is there the possibility that shyness is merely encouraged by escaping into a mobile app? Is it down to the less shy people in a room to try and introduce the shy person into the environment?

While this post was originally a peeve of mine, some of the comments and conversations on Twitter are opening up a much wider area of discussion. A new post calls, I think.

And I'd buy your book! ;-)

David Spinks · 6 months ago

Lots of great points here in post and in the comments. I just think this is the world we’re living in now. People are becoming addicted to staying connected. Whether we're at work, at a bar or where ever else, we feel the need to be connected not just to the people you're with, but to EVERYONE. Is it right? Not sure...but it's happening and it's not changing anytime soon.

I agree with you about social situations like dinner or mid conversation, it's completely rude to pull out your phone and start typing away. During a speaker, I guess that depends on the person. If they're able to post main points that a speaker makes while still paying attention, I don't see a problem with it. It's definitely a changing environment for speakers, but they'll have to adapt the same way everyone has to adapt when technology shifts.

It also depends on why you use these tools. As a community manager, I'm pretty much always on call and have to remain accessible at all times. If there's a customer with a problem, I better be there. This would be impossible without mobile technology/tools.

David

Teresa Basich · 6 months ago

I'm with Mr. Schechter up there. I think this post addresses a couple different things -- the power of these tools have to enhance your work and also the abuse of them.

I'm with you in that we really lean way too much on technology these days, and I think many of us do it specifically to avoid making those human connections anymore. Then there are some of us who just can't let go.

To tweet mid-sentence or spend more time proliferating what you hear at a conference than actually absorbing what's being said is inappropriate and often detrimental to you, the people you're with, and probably your business, too.

But used in moderation and without alienating your friends and colleagues, I think mobile apps can be great things. Granted, I don't have a Blackberry or an iPhone either, but I've had moments where I wished for one or the other, and those moments weren't ones in which I would've alienated myself or my relationships with others.

Great food for thought!
.-= Teresa Basich´s last blog post ...Twitter is Weeding, Not Killing, the Blogosphere =-.

Danny · 6 months ago

Don't tell Michael you agree with him, Teresa, we'll never hear the end of it... ;-)

I agree with both you and David above you - a lot of it does fall into user moderation. Some are better than others. The proliferation of apps certainly makes it more tempting for users to abuse, perhaps unknowingly, and that's something I think could do with improving.

MSchechter · 6 months ago

Danny... do you remember that time that Teresa agreed with me? That was great, wasn't it :)
.-= Michael Schechter´s last blog post ...How Evernote Is Pulling My Life Together! =-.

Kasey Skala · 6 months ago

It's funny you mention this. I'm the same way. 3-4 years ago when I wasn't as active online I had a Treo. Thought it was cool because I could get email on my phone. Turns out I didn't use it at all, only to make and take calls. Now that I am more involved online, I have a basic flip phone.

It's a form of balance for me. Like you mentioned, when I'm out eating that's my time with friends/family. I stare at a computer all day, this is my time to clear my mind, adjust my eyes and relax. Some people can handle being connect 24/7 - just not me.

Danny · 6 months ago

I'm with you on that front. Since I work primarily online, I can tend to forget how long I'm in front of a screen - I can't imagine my downtime being tied up with smart phone screens too! ;-)

SaraKate · 6 months ago

I'm feeling much the same way (the people are more important than the tools). Sometimes I almost wish all this technology didn't exist because then people would be forced to interact more face-to-face. I really appreciate connections in person and would much rather have dinner with someone or sit outside on a park bench in the rain, even, than be forced to talk to people over the internet.

In some cases, though, it's necessary - for instance, connecting to people in different countries is a lot easier. However, I think people are often forgetting what the cellular phone was originally invented for - talking on the phone. As much as getting Tweets from people excites me, I would much rather have an actual conversation, if possible.

If I had a smart phone that would accommodate Tweetdeck or Tweetie or one of those services, I might use it to check @replies or direct messages in addition to posting my own Tweets, but when I'm away from the computer, I'd rather be doing something else!

Call me old-fashioned, if you like, but I agree with you, Danny.

Danny Brown · 6 months ago

The new Tweetdeck update supports the iPhone (though, not having tried it admittedly, I wonder how useful the multi-screen options of Tweetdeck will be on the iPhone's screen).

But that's a great point you make, Sara - I think we do tend to forget what the technologies were made for. Twitter? Love it. Human voice? Irreplaceable.

BarryK · 6 months ago

Danny, I agree with you. I actually put twitter on my blackberry and I am considering dumping it. If I can't wait until I get home to go online than I have a real problem.

If you are out with friends or a social event, and continue to tweet, stay home! I have always heard about being "present". How can you do that if you stray to your twitter account while socializing with friends or associates.

All our social media and so many people have a problem being truly social.

Danny Brown · 6 months ago

"All our social media and so many people have a problem being truly social" - couldn't have said it better myself, Barry.

ShaneKinkennon · 6 months ago

I'm new to this scene, so have pondered this question quietly. But a good southern boy, I'm not new to politeness ... and i gotta look people in the eye. I love the real-time view into conversations that Twitter provides, which I would not have otherwise But I've certainly wondered what the person on the other end of that conversation is thinking as the Tweeter does a running upload mid-sentence.

Danny Brown · 6 months ago

That's definitely where live tweetups come into play. I have to admit, I've been surprised many times by the real-life version of someone I connect with regularly. The majority, surprised in a good way. A few - not so much. It does show that you can never be 100% sure until, as you say, you can look someone in the eye and gauge real emotion, sincerity, whatever, that you can get a feeling of how genuine it all is.

I hope the proliferation of real-time technology doesn't erode real-life interaction. Which, I guess, makes the conversation happening here in the comments quite ironic. ;-)

David · 6 months ago

Being from the other side of Mr. Hadrian's wall, I have to say that I totally disagree and that for me mobile apps (not just Twitter ones) are essential - at least for me.

Since I spend a lot of time on the road, I need to be able to keep in touch and I rely on my iPhone for this. I also have to contend with the IT Guy at my office ( http://totallyincorrect.com/?p=2423 ) so for most of the time I'm awake, I have no other connection than my phone. I'm actually pretty excited that the new Tweetdeck iPhone app is going to let me take part in #chats from my phone.

Having said that, I try not to let my manners deteriorate just because I'm connected 24/7. I never answer my phone when I with a client, let alone play around on Twitter or Facebook. I must admit, I hate it when I'm disconnected - a lot of my clients are defense companies and I often can't take my phone to meetings there AAARRRRGGGHHHH!!!!!

Danny Brown · 6 months ago

I understand that completely, David - there are some huge uses of smartphones from both a personal and business perspective. It's the non-critical use that seems to get abused the most, sadly, and where the personal relationships and friendships suffer from it.

And about that wall - who builds something 2-foot tall and expects it to make a difference?? ;-)

David · 6 months ago

I have a great image from a wedding we photographed last year. The bride and groom are at their table at the reception tapping away on their iPhones - they had no idea I was there.

When I asked them, they were both updating their Facebook status to Married!

Oh - that wall? I guess it did work for a while, then Gordon Brown and those guys found a way round it =)

Mike Smith · 6 months ago

I have a twitter app on my blackberry and rarely use it unless I'm shopping with my girlfriend and she's trying stuff on and I have free time or if we're driving somewhere and I just have that urge to stay connected.

I do like this post though and agree with the "live tweeting" which I could see as being a bit counter productive for people.

suzemuse · 6 months ago

yes indeedy, my friend. I'm definitely not a fan of the rude in-your-face tweeting that I see many people doing when in mixed company. "Mixed company" is the operative phrase here. There are times when I do think it's appropriate. For example, most Friday afternoons, a group of Ottawa tech-geeks meet up at a downtown watering hole for our weekly wind-down session. There's anywhere from 4 to 8 of us, and we're merrily tapping away on laptops, iPhones, and other devices. We're also talking to each other directly, but we're carrying the conversation into the online space as well.

For this particular event, tweeting and blogging and posting photos to Flickr are all part of the socializing. But we all know that going in. So nobody feels like it's rude or anti-social. In fact, it's quite the opposite. We're loud and boisterous, to the point where I'm sure even the Twitter community can hear us!

It's comes down to common sense. I wouldn't haul out my laptop at my girlfriend's birthday party. I wouldn't spend the whole night tweeting at my parent's anniversary (unless it was just to post a quick photo of the happy couple). And I wouldn't waste an entire conference "live tweeting" it for the benefit of a few people who may only be mildly interested.

Like our mums taught us - in a social situation, use common sense and mind your manners, and not only will you have more fun but you just might get invited back.

:)

Danny Brown · 6 months ago

See, that I can understand. It's all similar people doing similar things - and who doesn't love a nerdfest?? ;-)

Like you say, it's just the other side of the coin where it might be one techy in a group of "normal" people who don't care about tweeting or Facebooking and just want to hang out with a friend. And the friend is busy hanging out with "strangers" online.